Brett June 30, 2020

One of the highest callings of a leader is to live a fully integrated life. The best leaders are passionate about what Michael Hyatt calls the double win – winning at work and in the home.

The highest calling of a leader is to live a fully integrated life. True leaders pursue the double win - winning at work and at home. Share on X

Leadership is life and should not be extracted from it. The best leaders are regular people accomplishing extraordinary things and extraordinary people living very ordinary lives at home and in the community.

Leadership is life and should not be extracted from it. The best leaders are regular people accomplishing extraordinary things and extraordinary people living very ordinary lives at home and in the community. Share on X

Today I am posting a list of 12 ordinary things you can do every day to maintain an integrated life as a leader – spiritually, emotionally, physically, relationally and professionally, I call it the daily dozen.

These habits are entirely possible for just about any leader. The benefit is not is knowing them but doing them. And committing to doing them every day over a long period of time.

This list has evolved over the years but the basic idea remains – create a list of things to do every day that in doing them, will ensure I maintain an integrated life and then monitor progress regularly.

The concept was taken from John Maxwell’s book, Today Matters. If you have your own version of this, let me know, I’d love to learn from you.

1. Rise With my Alarm. This is the heroic moment – mind over mattress – no snooze button allowed. Carpe Diem! This habit, formed over 25 years of service in the ministry, has provided more benefits than I can count. Choosing resilience in the first waking moment of the day strengthens the habit of exercising integrity in the moment of choice.  The ability to do what you should do but don’t necessarily want to do because it is the right thing to do is about as important as anything you can learn as a leader.

The ability to do what you should do but don't want to do because it is the right thing to do is about as important as anything you can learn. Share on X

2. Express Affection to Andrea: A simple hug or kiss on the cheek is all that’s needed to say, “I love you, you are my best friend, we are in this together and I’m committed to you forever.” In relationships, the little things are the big things. Doing this every morning for over 25 years now has been critical in terms of communicating one key message – no matter what storm we are facing, I will never leave. Ever.

3. Personal Prayer. After sitting down with a cup of coffee, I enter a time of communion with God. This is by far the most important part of my day. It begins by asking (again) for the gift of prayer, opening my heart to the Holy Spirit, focusing on the Father’s presence, resting in Jesus’ mercy, bringing my whole self to Him (heart, soul, mind, memory, etc.). I spend time reflecting on scripture, meditation, intercession, worship, thanksgiving and journaling.

man wearing blue plaid dress shirt and blue jeans

4. Spiritual Reading. I try to spend a consistent amount of time each day in a good spiritual book, one that expands my knowledge and understanding of God or the spiritual life. St. Catherine of Sienna said, “Great books are like bait for the soul.” Here is a shortlist of authors from whom I have learned much: Jacques Philippe, John Eldredge, Henri Nouwen, Peter Kreeft, Ralph Martin, and Thomas Dubay.

St. Catherine of Sienna said that great books are like bait for the soul. Share on X

5. Leadership Development. I try to read or listen to a podcast for at least 20-30 minutes every day for the sake of getting better as a leader. Often I do this during my morning walk or commute. Audible is a fantastic resource if you enjoy audiobooks. Michael Hyatt recently wrote, “Not all readers are leaders, but great leaders are all readers.” I have 7 leadership podcasts that I subscribe to at the moment.

6. Exercise. The more responsibility one has, the more important it is to exercise. Three keys: 1) aerobic activity to increase the heart rate for 20 mins or more; 2) exercises that improve muscular strength especially in the core; and, 3) stretching and flexibility. I think exercise is the ultimate multiplier – the more you exercise the better you eat and sleep; the better you eat and sleep the better you think; the better you think, the better you discern, decide and communicate … and the better you do all that, the better you lead.

7. Affirm the kids. Dad’s have an irreplaceable role of breathing life into the hearts of their kids. I wrote about that last week. One special way of doing this is by offering them regular words of affirmation. Catch them doing the right thing, honour them for a good decision, make heroes of their virtue around the supper table, write notes for their lunch bags, send an affirming text if they live away from home.  It doesn’t take much effort, but these little deposits go a long way in building their confidence and courage.

8. Say thank you. Expressing sincere thanks to others is a certain way of developing a grateful heart. Thank a friend for their presence in your life; thank your kids for the joy they bring to you; thank your staff for the extra effort to get the project done; thank a custodian for doing a great job; thank your boss for giving you flexibility in defining your job. Once you develop this habit, it gets easier every day. There are many ways to express thanks: a handwritten note, you can send an email or text, pick up the phone or drop by somebody’s desk. Doesn’t have to be elaborate, just sincere. If you want to learn more from an expert on gratitude, check out Steve Foran here.

9. Engage in difficult conversations. Yes, this can be done every day and probably should be. Avoiding conversations that are difficult only compounds the problem. I wrote a blog about how to master difficult conversations here. It might help.

10. Encourage the hearts of your staff. The less there is of something in the world, the more valuable it becomes. Encouraging words are valuable because many of us live without them. As a result, when it comes to believing in themselves, many people are agnostic. I wrote a blog on The Power of Encouraging Words here.

don't give up. You are not alone, you matter signage on metal fence

11. Dream. A good friend gave me a challenge a few years ago. He said, “Get a blank piece of paper and write the question, ‘What if?’ in big, bold letters. Then invite God into the process of coming up with the answer.” I can’t tell you how many crazy, wonderful, powerful dreams and ideas have surfaced during those times of reflection on this question. This blog is the result of asking that question and inviting God into it. Remember dreaming is the first and most important part of planning.

12. Examen. It is crucial in life to properly interpret the events, circumstances and conversations we experience. The Examen is a technique of prayerfully reflecting on the matters of the day with an eye for seeing the Holy Spirit’s presence and direction.  It was introduced to the world by St. Ignatius of Loyola (Founder of the Jesuits) in his Spiritual Exercises. It might help to journal your thoughts and prayerful senses you have during your daily examen.

There you have it, 12 practices I try to do every day to live an integrated life as a leader. These have evolved over time but for the most part they are an intentional effort in trying to grow spiritually, emotionally, physically, relationally and in every other way.

Your future is shaped by what you to today, not tomorrow. Make today count.