Thank you for taking this 5-day journey with me exploring the key lessons we have learned after 25 years of marriage. There are more lessons learned than there is time to post them! Please continue to submit comments, feedback or questions.
Today’s post is the final article in a 5-part series. Lesson #5: Parenting is a Leadership Endeavour.
Leadership development is a multi-billion dollar industry. Companies make huge financial investments in their senior leaders, emerging stars and high-potentials. They make these investments because organizations that are well led outperform organizations that are poorly led. As Dr John C. Maxwell says, “Everything rises and falls on leadership.”
It’s hard to miss the irony. Companies invest millions of dollars expecting significant and long-term returns but most leaders exit the company long before the investment pays off. Furthermore, most of today’s Fortune 500 companies will no longer exist even 30 years from now – think Enron, Amoco and Blockbuster. So much money invested with so little return.
Saint John Paul II said, “The future of the Church and the world passes through the family.” When it comes to leadership, the home is where leadership matters most. Share on XThe family is the longest-lasting human institution. It is the most basic unit of society, upon which everything else is built – EVERYTHING. Saint John Paul II said, “The future of the Church and the world passes through the family.” When it comes to leadership, the home is where leadership matters most.
Intentional Parenting Leadership
I hold three convictions about parenting: 1) Parents have the most leadership intensive role in the world; 2) Good parents aren’t perfect but they are purposeful and, 3) There is a large margin of error, thank God!
Three convictions about parenting: 1) Parents have the most leadership intensive role in the world; 2) Good parents aren’t perfect but they are purposeful and, 3) There is a large margin of error, thank God! Share on XJohn Maxwell defined leadership with these words: “Leadership is influence, nothing more and nothing less.” The ultimate test of leadership is getting another person to participate. If you think you are a leader but no one is following you, you are only going for a walk.
How do these statements apply to parenting? Parenting is a leadership endeavour because it all comes down to influence. Parents of young children are making daily deposits of love, trust, understanding and empathy so that when the kids begin making their own decisions and choices, mom and dad remain their primary influencers by the choice of their children.
Raising Adults not Children
My wife and I decided early on that we would raise adults, not children. This doesn’t mean we denied the kids a healthy childhood full of fun and adventure. What is means is that we had a long-term vision in mind for the kind of adults we hoped our kids would become.
This approach provided us with a strong sense of intentionality, long-term perspective and clear parenting purpose. Most parents would want their kids to grow up as independent people. With a “raising adults not children” paradigm, independence isn’t the end in mind. Yes, we want to raise children who can take care of themselves but we also want to raise adults who can take care of others and want to.
Parents: Independence isn't the end in mind. We want to raise children that become adults who can take care of themselves but also take care of others and want to. Share on XOver the years I have posted many articles on parenting to this site. As my final contribution to this series, I will leave you with a few of those posts.
The best gift parents can give their very young children is to experience Jesus as a friend. Click on this post Friendship before Lordship to learn more.
Click on this post to discover 8 Ways Dads Can Affirms Their Kids.
Parents that are serious about raising adults not children pay much attention to the balance between responsibilities and privileges. One of the best ways to foster a sense of responsibility within children is through family chores. Check out this post Family Chores and Why They Matter.
If you read the previous posts this week, you understand how important athletics are to our family. Sports have allowed our kids to pursue some of their athletic and academic dreams. Check out this article I wrote: Ten Messages for Young Catholics in Elite Sports.
One final gift for consideration. Andrea and I wrote an eBook entitled, “Creating Your Family Crest.” It describes the 3-year journey we took to create our own crest. It explains the theory behind it, the value of having a family crest and the meaning to all our symbols, colours and shapes. It’s yours for free when you subscribe to my blog. Get it by clicking on the link: Creating Your Family Crest.
Thanks again for taking this journey! God bless you, your marriage and family.
Brett