The Best Leaders are Grounded in Real Life

Leaders are ordinary people accomplishing extraordinary things and extraordinary people living very ordinary lives at home and in the community.

Today I’m posting a list of 12 things I try to do every day – at work, at home, spiritually, emotionally, physically, relationally and professionally. It’s called the daily dozen.

This list has evolved over the years but the basic idea remains the same. Create a daily task list that will ensure I maintain an integrated life as a leader.

The concept was taken from John Maxwell’s book, Today Matters. If you have your own version of this, let me know, I’d love to learn from you.

1. Wake up! Rise immediately with my alarm. This is the heroic moment – mind over mattress, no snooze button allowed, Carpe Diem!

2. Express affection to Andrea first thing in the morning. A simple hug or kiss on the cheek is all that’s needed to say, “I love you, you are my best friend, we are in this together and I’m committed to you forever.”

3. Personal prayer. After sitting down with a cup of coffee, I enter a time of communion with God. This is by far the most important part of my day. It begins by asking (again) for the gift of prayer, opening my heart to the Holy Spirit, focusing on the Father’s presence, resting in Jesus’ mercy, bringing my whole self to Him (heart, soul, mind, memory, etc.). I spend time reflecting on scripture, meditation, intercession, worship, thanksgiving and journaling.

4. Spiritual reading. I try to spend a consistent amount of time each day in a good spiritual book, one that expands my knowledge and understanding of God or the spiritual life. St. Catherine of Sienna said, “Great books are like bait for the soul.” Here is a short list of authors from whom I have learned much: Jacques Philippe, John Eldredge, Henri Nouwen, Peter Kreeft, Ralph Martin, and Thomas Dubay.

5. Leadership reading. I try to read for at least 20 minutes every day to get better as a leader. Often I do this during my commute. Audible is a fantastic resource if you enjoy audio books. Michael Hyatt recently wrote, “Not all readers are leaders, but great leaders are all readers.” I will soon publish a blog to hi-lite some of my favourite authors and how their words have impacted my life and leadership.

6. Exercise. The more responsibility one has the more important it is to exercise. Three keys: 1) aerobic activity to increase the heart rate for 20 mins or more; 2) exercises that improve muscular strength especially in the core; and, 3) stretching and flexibility. I think exercise is the ultimate multiplier – the more you exercise the better you eat and sleep; the better you eat and sleep the better you think; the better you think, the better you discern, decide and communicate … and the better you do all that, the better you lead.

7. Affirm the kids. Dad’s have an irreplaceable role of breathing life into the hearts of their kids. One special way of doing this is by offering them regular words of affirmation. Catch them doing the right thing, honour them for a good decision, make heroes of their virtue around the supper table, write notes for their lunch bags, send an affirming text if they live away from home. It doesn’t take much effort, but these little deposits go a long way in building their confidence and courage.

8. Say thank you. Expressing sincere thanks to others is a sure way to develop a grateful heart. Thank a friend for their presence in your life; thank your kids for the joy they bring to you; thank your staff for the extra effort to get the project done; thank a custodian for doing a great job; thank your boss for giving you flexibility in defining your job. Once you develop this habit, it gets easier every day. There are many ways to express thanks: a handwritten note, you can send an email or text, pick up the phone or drop by somebody’s desk. Doesn’t have to be elaborate, just sincere. If you want to learn more from an expert on gratitude, check out Steve Foran here.

9. Engage in difficult conversations. Yes, this can be done every day and probably should be. Avoiding conversations that are difficult only compounds the problem. I wrote a recent blog about how to master difficult conversations here. It might help.

10. Encourage the hearts of your staff. The less there is of something in the world, the more valuable it becomes. Encouraging words are valuable because many of us live without them. As a result, when it comes to believing in themselves, many people are agnostic. I wrote a blog on The Power of Encouraging Words here.

11. Dream. A good friend gave me a challenge a few years ago. He said, “Get a blank piece of paper and write the question, ‘What if?’ in big, bold letters. Then invite God into the process of coming up with the answer.” I can’t tell you how many crazy, wonderful, powerful dreams and ideas have surfaced during those times of reflection on this question. This blog is the result of asking that question and inviting God into it. Remember dreaming is the first and most important part of planning.

12. Examen. It is crucial in life to properly interpret the events, circumstances and conversations we experience. The Examen is a technique of prayerfully reflecting on the matters of the day with an eye for seeing the Holy Spirit’s presence and direction. It was introduced to the world by St. Ignatius of Loyola (Founder of the Jesuits) in his Spiritual Exercises. It might help to journal your thoughts and prayerful senses you have during your daily examen.

There you have it, 12 practices I try to do every day to live an integrated life as a leader. These have evolved over time but for the most part they are an intentional effort in trying to grow spiritually, emotionally, physically, relationally and in every other way.

Your future is shaped by what you to today, not tomorrow. Make today count.